DREAMS of a CLOUD

Peruse the many random ramblings of a writer-in-training as I build stories and develop my craft.

Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud

30 September 2023

“Fortunately, you arrived before my shield could shatter, and none of the oni who fled have returned.” She bowed to Hanako. “Thank you. It is because of your actions that Nanmoku is safe.”

When Hanako woke up, she found herself in a lavish bedroom. The blankets covering her were of the highest quality, including silken sheets, and she’d been changed into a comfortable white kimono.

She sat up carefully and winced. Even with her unusually high regeneration, burn scars crawled up both her arms, and she had to push off a mild headache.

“The doctor informed me you are quite lucky to be alive; the burns alone would have debilitated most people, red oni or not.” A tall, full-figured woman stepped out from a corner of the room. Nine fluffy golden tails waved behind her, matching her long golden hair. Hanako realized this must be the woman who had helped her from the wall.

Hanako took a few deep breaths to center herself, then looked up at the woman. “How long have I been out? And how is the village? Was anyone hurt?”

The woman shook her head. “Fortunately, you arrived before my shield could shatter, and none of the oni who fled have returned.” She bowed to Hanako. “Thank you. It is because of your actions that Nanmoku is safe.”

With a nod, Hanako leaned back into her pillows. Then her eyebrows scrunched together. “What about their prisoners? They… took people from Tsurui. Are any of them…?”

The kitsune grimaced and looked away. “We’ve… done what we can. They’re still alive–the ones we found, at least–but even the ones without visible scars will not heal quickly from something like that.”

Hanako grimaced but nodded. She stared at the kitsune for a moment or two, then forced herself to sit back up and offer her hand. “My name’s Hanako.”

A smile appeared on the kitsune’s face as she accepted. “Mikuzume. It’s a pleasure.”

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Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud

20 September 2023

The second ushi-oni turned around, and the last two red oni whirled and began racing Hanako’s direction. Hanako couldn’t afford to spare them more than a glance, though, as the ushi-oni before her tried to squash her flat again and again. It finally stopped and sucked in a deep breath. A purplish fog leaked out the corners of its mouth.

…cracked her ribs. Despite all that, she just grit her teeth, and carefully controlled her breathing to minimize the pain.

As Hanako brought her sword to bear, a small ball of blue flame flew past her head and struck the blue oni. He screamed as he burst aflame. Hanako glanced back to see a woman standing on the town’s wall, an array of nine fluffy tails fanned out behind her. A kitsune?

Before Hanako could acknowledge her, an obese female red charged at her with a massive cleaver raised over her head. With a grimace, Hanako angled her sword upwards, letting the oni impale herself, and sidestepped the oni’s attack by the narrowest of margins.

That wasn’t enough to put the other oni down, however; she was lost in her rampage. She roared in Hanko’s face, pelting her with spittle, while the closer ushi-oni turned around to stomp Hanako and anything nearby into paste.

Hanako pulled her sword out of the oni and dashed to the side, slicing through one of the ushi-oni’s foremost legs as she passed. The beast squealed as black, putrescent blood spurt from the wound. Hanako’s momentum safely carried her beyond the spray, but the red oni behind her wasn’t so lucky. She roared, and when Hanako glanced back, she saw that everywhere the blood landed burned the oni’s skin, and the wound Hanako had given her already festered. The oni only moved a step or two further before she collapsed.

Meanwhile, a few more oni fled for the trees, and another fell to the kitsune’s foxfire. Nearby, a rare three-horned oni with skin like obsidian roared out, “You fools! Never mind the shield! Destroy the intruder already!”

The second ushi-oni turned around, and the last two red oni whirled and began racing Hanako’s direction. Hanako  couldn’t afford to spare them more than a glance, though, as the ushi-oni before her tried to squash her flat again and again. It finally stopped and sucked in a deep breath. A purplish fog leaked out the corners of its mouth.

Hanako’s eyes went wide, and she dove underneath the beast. Not a moment later, the ushi-oni breathed out a cloud of noxious gas. One of the reds charging in got caught in it and collapsed onto the the now-decaying grass like a puppet with its strings cut.

Hanako didn’t stop moving; she sliced into the beast’s abdomen as she ran, then charged for the three-horned oni. She wasn’t sure if she would be able to cut him, given her injuries; ebony oni had notoriously durable skin, even stronger than steel. But maybe, with the ushi-oni around, she wouldn’t have to.

Before Hanako could reach him, though, the last red body-checked her. She gasped in pain as she rolled across the ground, only to land at the three-horned oni’s feet.

He smiled cruelly and swung his weapon; Hanako rolled out of the way and back onto her feet, only to find the second ushi-oni barrelling down on her.

Hanako dodged another blow from the three-horned oni and jumped up, using him as a springboard to get above the ushi-oni. She roared as she brought her sword down on the beast’s neck and cleaved its head off. The three-horned oni was caught in the ensuing spray of blood and screamed in pain.

Once she could approach him without contacting the ushi-oni’s blood herself, Hanko put him out of his misery. A careful glance around revealed she was alone on the battlefield; the last red oni had fallen to the kitsune’s foxfire while Hanako was distracted, and the other ushi-oni had collapsed from its wounds.

A wave of exhaustion swept over hanako, and she barely noticed the shield over Nanmoku drop, or when the kitsune dropped down and ran toward her. She only smiled to herself. “Hey. I actually made it this time.”

Then everything went black.

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Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud

19 September 2023 part 2

That was when the charging ushi-oni arrived and crushed both with its spider legs, each as large as Hanako herself. Hanako narrowly avoided its charge, and swung at a bearded blue oni that appeared beside her. He blocked the attack with his tetsubo and uppercut her with his offhand, jarring her out of her rage.

All at once, all the pain she’d been ignoring crashed down on her at once. Burns stretched down both arms and her sides, and by the pain she felt each time she drew breath, Hanako was fairly certain she’d at least cracked her ribs.

Almost by instinct, Hanako drove the point of her sword into the ground, grounding out the ivory oni’s attack. Her rage burned through the pain, focused so intently on the ivory she barely noticed several of the other oni fleeing back into the forest.

The ivory’s eyes went wide, and he brought his hand up to strike her again. This time, Hanako redirected it into a charging red, barely noticing him collapse to the ground. She was so focused, in fact, she never noticed an female ebony oni swing her tetsubo into hanako’s side.

Hanako crashed to the ground and rolled, the pain in her ribs swallowed up by her rage. She tempered it a bit, enough to be aware of her surroundings, but her goal remained putting that ivory out of action.

For his part, the ivory was in a full-blown panic, and shouted something to one of the ushi-oni. The beast turned and began to charge their direction, even as the ivory raised his hand to blast Hanako again. Before he could, Hanako burst across the remaining distance and sliced off his arm, then pivoted and slashed his throat.

The female ebony caught up and swung her tetsubo at Hanako’s head, while a massive, one-eyed red tried to smash her to a pulp with his club. Hanako ducked around both attacks and cut the red’s feet out from under him. He roared and toppled into the ebony.

That was when the charging ushi-oni arrived and crushed both with its spider legs, each as large as Hanako herself. Hanako narrowly avoided its charge, and swung at a bearded blue oni that appeared beside her. He blocked the attack with his tetsubo and uppercut her with his offhand, jarring her out of her rage.

All at once, all the pain she’d been ignoring crashed down on her at once. Burns stretched down both arms and her sides, and by the pain she felt each time she drew breath, Hanako was fairly certain she’d at least cracked her ribs.

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Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud

12 August 2023

The black oni by the wagon never had a chance to sense Hanako before his head fell off his shoulders. Five more oni died before the rest even recognized something was wrong. The others tried to surround her and kill her, but none were able to get within an arm's length of her and live.

Then the world turned white, and all she could feel was pain.

Here is part 1 of Hanako’s battle for Nanmoku. Ironically, right after I wrote this—either that same day, or early on the very next—I choreographed the rest of the fight via graph paper, and then proceeded to sit on it for a month. Part of that was getting distracted by other things; there are a lot of amazing stories out there, even among more amateur writing communities like Royal Road. But I think I was a bit intimidated by the following scenes, too. Still, I got it, and they’re written now. Just have to write the aftermath…

Ah, also, about this point is when I started pinning down what the different kinds of oni are capable of; red oni are berserkers, blue are tacticians with an element of “drunken fist”, black (which I call ebony from here on out, to at least try to avoid unfortunate implications) are especially durable, and white/ivory have lightning powers. Still working on yellow.

As the sun sank below the horizon the next day, Hanako could hear the roars of angry oni, and could see the bolts of lightning falling on one location again and again. Even as a grim feeling settled in the pit of her stomach–she was too late to save the town–she also felt a bit of hope. If the oni were still fighting, then there was still someone to save.

That lightning would be a problem, though. Hanako had never had to fight an ivory-skinned oni before, and she didn’t exactly relish the thought. Ah well. One thing at a time.

Then Hanako broke out of the tress, and to her amazement, Nanmoku still stood whole and intact. It was surrounded by a shield of blue energy, which not one but two ushi-oni beat on, and was the reason the ivory oni was calling down lightning without stopping.

Roughly thirty other oni milled about outside, without any sense of order or organization. Most of the red ones, enraged at being denied their hunt, beat on the shield alongside the ushi-oni, while the blue and black ones held back and watched impatiently. One headed over to a row of caged wagons Hanako had missed, and with a start she realized that’s where the last survivors of Tsurui must be.

Memories of what she’d seen in that town washed over her, and the monster inside her roared. This time, though, she welcomed it. Channeled it. There was no need to hold back against monsters such as these.

The black oni by the wagon never had a chance to sense Hanako before his head fell off his shoulders. Five more oni died before the rest even recognized something was wrong. The others tried to surround her and kill her, but none were able to get within an arm's length of her and live.

Then the world turned white, and all she could feel was pain.

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Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud Hanako, 2023 Nathaniel Cloud

13 April 2023

Hanako knelt before the shrine and offered a prayer. “Please, let me protect them this time. Help me keep the town safe.”

When she stood, she noticed a miko she’d somehow missed on the way in standing a ways away. She was two to three inches taller than Hanako, and her warm brown hair was tied in a long braid down her back. Their eyes met, and the miko took a step toward Hanako. “Ah, pardon me. Is this your first time here? I don’t think I recognize you.”

“No, I’m new in town,” Hanako replied, with a shake of her head. She offered her hand. “My name’s Hanako.”

The miko clasped Hanako’s hand with both of hers. “Welcome! It’s a pleasure to meet you. You can call me Mikuzume.”

I decided to go ahead and move the encounter with Mikuzune to Nanmoku, and tried to figure out ways for Keiko and the other villagers to show support. Honestly, this whole bit feels pretty rough, still. I kinda want to expand on the two builders, let them become characters in their own right, but I’m not sure what they could contribute. If I do, I’d likely expand the trip a bit to include some of the banter or discussions they have enroute.

Really, this felt like a very gardener-style chapter, even more than usual, referring to the different ways authors craft stories (pulled from Brandon Sanderson in one of his online lectures, I think). I was going to have them all go straight to Nanmoku, but then imagining her discussion with the elder, and considering her personality some more, she really would go scope things out first. No idea what happens there, either; kind of want to know what I want her to be dealing with at the end of the arc before I start trying to foreshadow it.

Keiko met Hanako on her way out of town, along with two of the men from the construction crews, Daiki and Fumito. “You’re headed to Nanmoku, right?” she said, before Hanako could even ask what was going on. “Take these two with you. I can’t spare anyone else, not with winter coming, but if you get there early enough to make some preparations, these two will be able to help the town set up defenses.”

Hanako’s eyes widened a bit. She hadn’t thought of that. She nodded, and the trio headed out to warn Nanmoku.

The trip was mostly uneventful; it was only two to three days from where the Chizu residents were trying to rebuild. About half a day outside of Nanmoku, Hanako separated from the two workers.

“Warn them about what’s coming,” she said. “I’m going to try to scout around and pinpoint exactly where this yokai army is at.”

[Insert first encounters/glimpses of yokai army and return trip here]

Nanmoku was bigger than Hanako had expected. Nicer, too; the whole place had a clean feeling, despite the number of people that must live here.

The town’s most notable feature, though, had to be the shrine at the top of the mountain. Hanako herself wasn’t particularly religious; she would occasionally make offerings to her ancestors, including Master, but that was about it. Still, something about the place drew her.

The shrine itself was clearly well-cared for. It was swept clean, and everything seemed bright and freshly painted. Hanako entered and slowly made her way to the shrine itself. Awed by the general atmosphere of the place, she knelt before it and offered a prayer. “Please, let me protect them this time. Help me keep the town safe.”

When she stood, she noticed a miko she’d somehow missed on the way in standing a ways away. She was two to three inches taller than Hanako, and her warm brown hair was tied in a long braid down her back. Their eyes met, and the miko took a step toward Hanako. “Ah, pardon me. Is this your first time here? I don’t think I recognize you.”

“No, I’m new in town,” Hanako replied, with a shake of her head. She offered her hand. “My name’s Hanako.”

The miko clasped Hanako’s hand with both of hers. “Welcome! It’s a pleasure to meet you. You can call me Mikuzume.”

Hanako found a smile slipping onto her face. She asked, “By chance, could you tell me where I could find the village elder? I have some important news to give him.”

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Current Draft of Hanako’s story (including unposted content)

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