9 February 2024

This was… really random. I don’t really know where my head was that day, other than the fact I didn’t want to think about anything too hard. I can’t even call it a crack-fic. It’s just… strange.

There is a question no one in Belobog or Penacony seems to know the answer to. Who, exactly, is the Garbage King?

Admittedly, this is because 99% (or more) of the population straight up doesn’t care. But you have those rare few–be they an eccentric Nameless or a certain struggling author–who know this secret could open the door to countless other discoveries.

So let’s ponder for a moment what sort of being he (or she) would have to be. What Aeon might he, and the trash can as a whole, worship? Not Nihility, for IX would not encourage such diligence; nor would Elation fit well, for his works are not bombastic or  entertaining enough. Neither Destruction nor the Hunt fit, and Yaoshi’s Abundance also is a bit too much of a stretch.

He could conceivably be some obscure, long-forgotten or presumed dead member of the Genius Society,; they are all eccentrics by nature, and if his devotion to trash was somehow inspired by a thirst for knowledge, it’s not inconceivable. HooH’s Equilibrium is an obvious choice, along with Preservation. A worshiper (or remnant) of Idrila the Beauty is not impossible, either; one who strives to find the beauty in anything, even the contents of a trash can, seems like it would fit well with such an eclectic order, as does one who takes care of trash to preserve the beauty around him. Finally, he could also have obscure ties to Harmony, in doing his part to make the world more clean and orderly.

26 January 2024

What would Malenia do in the world of Genshin Impact? Other than wreck everything, I mean.

Malenia said nothing for several minutes. “This world is too cheerful.”

“Eh. Sure, Teyvat certainly has a different feel to it than the Lands Between, but… its got its own shadows. Come, follow me.”

I led the goddess incumbent up Starsnatch cliff toward Dragonspine. I’m pretty sure I kept our arrival secret from the bastards on Celestia; from what I’ve seen, they wouldn’t take too kindly to our arrival.

The monsters die swiftly. The only surprise comes when the ruin guard near the Temple of a Thousand Winds caught sight of Malenia during a waterfowl, and even that wasn’t too much trouble. I don’t think anyone knows what to make of her; she is colored like a pyro character, but if there’s one element she’s not connected to, it’s fire. …Isn’t she basically a dendro character?

“Why is the lightning on this gods-forsaken world purple, of all things?” Malenia grumbled.

I blink. “I…actually don’t know. Let me check.” A quick, out-of-universe google study later, and… “Huh. In real life, natural lightning tends to look more purple. Maybe in the Lands Between, it looked yellow because of its association with grace and the Golden Order?”

Malenia nodded, musing on that as she impaled the hilichurl archer who’d prompted the question. SHe looked across the river, at the snowy foothills of Dragonspine. She took a deep breath in and commented, “Smells like home.”

“What, snow and the ever-present sense of danger?”

Malenia gave me a noncommittal grunt and jumped across the river. I sighed, then whistled for Torrent so I could follow behind. No sense in freezing to death before I even make it to the Nail.

8 May 2023

This one’s pretty short. I was traveling at the time, attending a wedding, so I was squeezing things in were I could. I think that’s another reason I went for fanfic; I didn’t want to spend too long figuring out what was happening. So here’s my take on what’s going through Malenia’s head during the opening cutscene to her boss fight. There’s one more of these I’ll post tomorrow (10 May 2023), which would eventually lead into the alternate route/side story for Malenia. I don’t know if I’ll ever get back to it, though; I’d prefer to prioritize my own stories.

When she woke, everything, especially her memory, was blurry and indistinct. She had the feeling that a piece of her was missing, but she didn’t have the foggiest idea what it was or where to look for it.

One thing she did remember, though, beyond the flashes of gold and rotten red from her dreams, was him. Her brother. He was… gone. But he heart beat with hope; he had promised he’d return.

By the time she had fully roused, she realized someone was standing before her. She didn’t recognize him, but there was something… His armor, in particular, made her incredibly wary of him.

She narrowed her eyes and drew her sword. “...Heed my words. I am Malenia. Blade of Miquella. And I have never known defeat.”

7 May 2023

I don’t typically write fanfic. It feels… strange to me, I guess? Regardless, Elden Ring sparked something, and I think a lot of that has to do with Malenia. I find her fascinating, both as a boss fight and as a character, and I low-key wanted a Malenia ending on top of the existing ones. Even after playing with the idea for a year and a half, I’m still not positive what that looks like, but I at least had a general idea of how it started.

Then I heard Aviators’ amazing song Half-Wolf about Blaidd, and I had a thought; would the needle free him from the Elden Beast’s influence? So I decided to write a scene about it.

Malenia followed behind the tarnished warrior, looking warily around as they strode through the Carian Manor. “Was this not the lair of the witch, Ranni? I rather doubt she would be pleased to see me…”

The tarnished grimaced. “She… isn’t here. I have reason to believe she’s on the Moonlit Plateau, actually.”

This only confused Malenia even more. “Then why lead us here? The Carians hold no love for me and my brother, not that I can blame them.”

The tarnished stopped, then turned to look at Malenia. “That needle, from Miquella. It can remove the influence of the outer gods?”

“Yes, generally.”

“And would that extend to the Erdtree and the Greater Will?”

“It should. Though… No matter the entity, if the hooks are deep enough, you may have to kill the source…”

He chuckled darkly. “I doubt that will be and issue.” He turned ahead, his eyes distant. “There Is… a good friend I want to save. He is one of the fiercest warriors I’ve ever known, and loyal. So loyal, in fact, that he sacrificed his own sanity rather than betray his lady.”

Malenia’s eyes grew wide. Memories flashed, of a pair of half-wolf soldiers. Brothers. They’d been loyal–more loyal than she’d thought possible. At least… until Miquella had slit from the Golden Order to create the Haligtree. Malenia still remembered the feel of their flesh on her sword.

She shook herself out of her reverie. “You can’t mean…?”

“Blaidd. His name is Blaidd.” The tarnished breathed in deeply through his nose, and readied his halberds. “Could I ask you to stay back and watch? If it’s at all possible, I’d like to avoid killing him.”

She almost denied him, but the tarnished so rarely asked for anything. “Very well. But if you die, I will kill him. I don’t care if you’ll come back, touched by grace.”

That earned another chuckle. “Thank you.”

Malenia watched as the tarnished found his half-wolf friend. It was an intense fight, in large part because the tarnished was pulling back on his attacks. He kept baiting the half-wolf warrior, waiting for the perfect opportunity.

And then it came. Blaidd thrust with his sword, and the tarnished narrowly dodged. He dropped his weapons, and with one hand grabbed Blaidd’s wrist, while with the other, he pulled out the needle and jammed it in the opening just under the armpit.

The half-wolf staggered, almost collapsing into the tarnished’s arms. When he pulled back, the madness was gone from his eyes, replaced with a growing anxiety.

“Old friend?” he said quietly.

The tarnished flashed him a sad smile. “Come. There is much to talk about. And not all of it good news.”

Malenia watched them enter the rise and decided to station herself at the door. It felt… intrusive, somehow, to involve herself further. Not for the first time, she wondered exactly what connection her savior had with the hated Lunar Witch.

17 October 2022

I was in something of a slump at this point, even starting a few days earlier I think. I actually didn’t write anything for the next three days after this; it wasn’t exactly ideal.

For the story itself, I’m a pretty big fan of Elden Ring, and my brother and I had been bouncing around ideas for our own high school AU for the shardbearers. There are some places where we definitely break canon, and as it was supposed to be a more light-hearted universe, certain things are changed (like changing Mohg’s unhealthy fixation on Miquella to be less sexual and more over-exuberant older sibling, or removing Shabriri, Seluvis, and the Dung Eater completely). I have at least one, maybe two other fanfic AUs in my head that I may or may not ever get around to writing.

Also, I forgot Varre. He’s definitely there, probably playing a cleric of some kind. Or a paladin. Or something.

“Welcome,” Mohg declared with a theatrical flair, “to the Moghwyn Dynasty! A land of adventure, intrigue, and glory awaits you!”

Rykard, his younger step-brother, groaned. “Can we just get to the game already?” The bags under his eyes could have explained his irritability, but everyone present knew that was just his natural state.

“Right.” Mohg deflated. “Then, could everyone introduce their characters?” He gestured to Rykard to start.

Rykard rolled his eyes. “I’m playing S’goth, a yuan-ti warlock, with a Fiend patron. I’ve been searching for something a long time now.”

Mohg beamed at him, then gestured to Phil, a tall senior who’d arrived in a massive hooded cloak. “I am playing the Sanguine Noble, an arcane trickster rogue who bathes in the blood of his enemies!”

When he heard that, Rykard cocked his head. “Does that mean our characters are allowed to be evil?”

Mohg shrugged. “So long as you don’t get too crazy and it doesn’t ruin party dynamics, I don’t mind.”

For the first time since arriving, Rykard’s pale face broke into a smile. The other four shuddered.

Mohg turned toward the next player expectantly. Miquella looked up at him, back down at his character sheet, and back up at Mohg before he finally asked, “Um, what am I doing here again?”

“We are playing D&D, where you will go on epic quests, discover hidden treasures, and more. You’re playing a life domain cleric.”